Do you know the ways in which the personality of young Muslims is torn apart while living in a western society? We, in Pakistan, are fortunate that we were born in a place surrounded by people with the same beliefs and practices. Practicing Islam in non-Muslim societies is far more difficult than in predominantly Muslim countries. This is particularly true for Muslim youth; they have their work cut out for them.
What makes it difficult is that it involves matters of everyday life and not something encountered once in a blue moon. What should they do when their school mates (male and female) want to hang out with them on the weekends doing what teenagers do? How should they respond to the advances of the opposite sex? The thought scares parents because if they let their child socialize with their peers, it may lead to the deterioration of his/her morals. But if they don’t, the child ends up being alienated and ostracized. Young Muslims experience multidimensional pressures including pressure from the family to practice their Deen and be a good Muslim, pressure from the society for assimilation and pressure from the peers to fit in.
The Life of Young Muslims
They live in two worlds; one inside their homes where their parents and other family members try to maintain an acceptable level of religious identity and the other is the world outside, where they experience contradiction after contradiction to their beliefs. This causes an identity crisis because they try to live up to the expectations of both the worlds and then end up confused about who they are and who they should be?
Take the case of Ahmad, as narrated by Ibrahim J. Long, a Muslim covert and a chaplain.
“Ibrahim,” he asked, “can you speak with me?” Ahmad, 19, was a young Muslim man struggling with peer pressure at his community college to drink and engage in sexual activity….. Ahmad came from a practicing Muslim home; he did not feel comfortable speaking to them about the peer pressures he faced…. He confessed to me that he had been giving in to them
[drinking and sexual activity] and knew that what he was doing was wrong… Ahmad was looking for something inspiring about the religion he had known his entire life, or some practical advice that could strengthen him against falling prey to these pressures…it was not just advice he was looking for, he was also desperate just to find someone able understand his situation.
Though I worried and prayed for him, since then I have not seen him.”
Among the most difficult issues for Muslim youth are maintaining relationships with the opposite gender and how to deal with the issue of premarital sex. Ahmad’s case is not unique; many young Muslims are in the same boat. What makes this situation worse is that they do not feel that there is anyone around who can help. These pressures often manifest themselves in unacceptable ways such as young Muslims giving up to the social pressures and embracing the ways of their peers, or sometimes by adopting dual identities. They please their parents by acting like good Muslims at home and they fit in with their peers by becoming one of them when away from home.
Who Should They Turn To?
They don’t want to talk to their families because they feel that their parents or other elders don’t understand where they are coming form. In most cases, the parents were born and raised in a Muslim country under completely different circumstances. So relating to the issues of their children is extremely difficult for them. Other than family, one of the sources that can be
consulted for guidance is the imams of the local masjids and community centers. But a majority of the imams are also immigrants from Muslim countries and their frame of reference does not correspond to a Muslim youth who is born and raised in the west.
This leaves these young souls in a precarious and distressing situation because they find themselves struggling against the vices that could corrupt them. They want to preserve their religious identity but at the same time they also want to be a part of the society they are living in and want to be seen as ‘normal’ young people.
What is the Solution?
For complex issues like this, there can’t be a one-size-fits-all solution. There are many aspects to this issue but one of the most important things to be done is relating to the youth and communicating with them on all levels. They should be able to reach out to people with whom they can share their thoughts and struggles and get practical advice that takes into account
the ground realities of everyday life of a young Muslim. Platforms that promote people who have been there and done that, can be a great help. When these young people feel that they are not alone in this predicament and there is someone who can help, they will get the strength to develop an identity that they can be proud of.
hello, brothers and sesters, I decided to write to tell you my story if you like , which is an example of a problem that threatens all the countries of Mediterranean, I am Khalid from Morocco, the city of Marrakech, 33 years old, single, at university, I work assistant accountant in a company in Marrakesh, I am the victim of a scam by two citizens of Guinea to the city of Rabat, Morocco.
the month of July, I was contacted via internet and telephone by a man, he presents himself as a son of a former Ivorian minister in Ivory Coast, he informs me that his father was killed by mens of Hassan Watara, and left a large sum of money in an agency of deposit in Mali, he asked me to help him to transfer and invest this money in Morocco, and work on its behalf by means of 20% in a company that it will create in Morocco, he entrusted his uncle happens to Morocco to see me and work together, it tells me that the money will be flown via private airplane and sends a diplomatic agency in two day, after 2days he contacted me and he give me the jussive and the bills sent to it will pay to free their money he asks me to find them a sum of money to pay those fees which are around 22 000 euro, because the money (4.5 million euro) is too according to that he said, and it has only 10 000 euro, he promised me myself to return the sum in two and four days, I contacted all my relatives and my friends, I took 90 000 dhs (8200 euro) and I give all that money, one day after he contacted me and informed me that he released the money and it needs a further 4800 euro to buy a product to clean the money that is polluted by a substance to escape the scanner at the security check, and finally I realized that it’s a scam, I contacted the police to file flap No. 628/cd/12 August, luckily it was caught, and after an investigation, and he was transferred to Rabat court and after the prison, but I lost my money because he send him in his country by western union, and I have to return this money to my friends as soon as possible to avoid going to court, knowing that my low salary does not allow me to save this money and I can not access bank loans because I am heavily indebted, and in addition I charge of a family that includes a father and mother who are old need medication, and did not retreat or other source, and a sister student, This is where I come to you in the hope of benefit your help and support, to address a problem, I contacted a lawyer and he confirmed that, legally can not get my money, I contacted several organizations, personalities, the Embassy of Guinea (because after the police investigation it was found that these people are guiniens, living in Morocco for four months), but no result. I hope the good Lord protect you and reward you, you and your family.
with my sincere thanks for your understanding and for your help. and thank you in advance. My email: victonaji_1978@hotmail.fr or victonaji_1978@hotmail.com thank you very much.
NB: I inform you that my country Morocco has experienced a wave of illegal immigrants coming through extensive borders between Morocco and neighboring countries, and it has to reach Europe, and after their stay in Morocco, they use many methods to collect the money for such purposes as beggars, theft, illegal trade in the streets, the drug trade and fraud.
Only one solution is to understand Islam with its true spirit and be a true Muslim, for which we need to show by our Amaal that we are muslim not just because we born in Muslim family and can read Quran. If you yourself respect your deen, Iman then definitely other will do that. U can not achieve it when u say to your western peers that “ohhh I don’t eat pork because it is not halal but then they find you drinking alcohol, lying, adultery etc…. As Sir Allama Mohammad Iqbal (may Allah’s mercy be upon him) said:
Wo sarapa-e-kirdar or tum srapa-e-guftar….
Hello,
Alahadulliah our lives are far more better than they could’ve ever been in Pakistan. Our children are better off growing here in western countries than those third world countries where there is no such standard-life-expectancy that your children shall not engage in drug abuse, Mobile phone sexual harassment, corruption, lawlessness and countless other crimes.
Working hours are being cut ??? where do you hear all this from, get your fact right mate, you are being mislead by those people who either wished to live abroad but couldn’t or those people who tried to abuse the foreign system but failed LOL.
Among many other things, here I am free to practice whichever religion I belong to (No one can shoot me). Bad apples are everywhere, and please stop this stupid propaganda and try to write on some sensible topics next time.
Having said all that, I love Pakistan and I would consider coming back to Pakistan someday, If;
1. Most people start offering 5 prayer a day.
2. stop giving/taking bribes.
3. Muslims stop drinking alcohol.
4. Muslims properly read the ingredients of imported food items to make sure they are Halal.
5. Women get the respect as mentioned in holy Quran
6. Everyone pays taxes, unless of course his/her salary is less than 10,000 Rs
7. People don’t fear entering police station
8. Justice is service at its best.
9. Equal opertunities for everyone
9. Television nudity stops.
10. When people from interior area are not dis-advantaged.
11. Private parties don’t take place in Major cities.
And the list goes on and on …..Mate, Fix your own problems first and stop spitting in the air, because It will blow right back into your face.
from the very first day I came here I was planning to go back to pakistan. I thought after a few years I will go back and raise my kids in Pakistan. but you know what happened???? when I went Pakistan I was really surprised to see the young generation of Pakistan. I was so moderen in my young life but here in Canada and America I saw alot of kids they are modern but not …………in Pakistan the young generation could not live without pizza, KFC and Mcdonald, butbhere kids like Pakistani foods. Rishwat, Qabza jhoot ka dor dora hay pakistan mein. kaun sa islami muld aur kaun si islam ki batein. we work hard here and send to them and they try to snatch everything from us
السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللّهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ
May Allah bless you always..
The most important thinh’s is keep our ‘Iman’. Hold it tight, no matter where you are.. Make our self proud for being moeslem. Don’t let them influense what we believe, but influense them with the beauty of being islam.. Take the lead, show them who must to follow! Allah Azza wa Jalla told us about how to live along with them..
Al-Mumtahina [60:1]
O ye who believe! Take not My enemies and yours as friends (or protectors)― offering them (your) love, even though they have rejected the Truth that has come to you, and have (on the contrary) driven out the Messenger and yourselves (from your homes), (simply) because ye believe in Allah your Lord! If ye have come out to strive in My Way and to seek My Good Pleasure (take them not as friends), holding secret converse of love (and friendship) with them: for I know full well all that ye conceal and all that ye reveal. And any of you that does this has strayed from the Straight Path.
You have an oppurtunity to collect much ‘pahala’ when you can keep your Believe in that kind of society then you live in moeslem society..
If you are affraid of you have no capable of doing that, its not a problem.. The earth is wide enought to live and to save our lovely son/doughter.. Don’t worry about. Allah will always give us the way..
At-Tahrim [66:6]
O ye who believe! save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe who flinch not (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allah, but do (precisely) what they are commanded.
If it is true and good, its came from Allah.. If I wrong, its came from me..
If there any other question sent me an email tomywai@facebook.com. I will be honor and I will be glad to have a friend to share, discuss and chat about islam..
وَعَلَيْكُمُ السَّلاَمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللّهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ
jazaakumullahu hairan.this article is so true,this is situation we are facing in Nigeria,sometimes we dont even know the wrong from the right thing.thanks alot,may Almighty Allah give you more wisdom.