Elections ahoy! Elections Ahoy! Yes people it’s almost time!
For the first time in the history of Pakistan a civilian government will hand over power to another civilian government (I got the chills just typing that).
But that’s the truth and it is time for us civilians to now decide who is going to plunder and loot… uh… I mean ‘govern’ us for the next five years.
To make it easier lets list down the candidates ….boxing style:
In the left corner we have PML-N. Yes, my friends our very own exponent of how to get the perfect hair transplant done.
PML-N, the same people who gave us the nuclear bomb, the motorway and… well, uh… that’s about it. They did however “Nawaz-o-fi” us with the yellow cab scheme, the money laundering scandals, Kargil and not to mention two 3-year terms of taking corruption a step further.
In the 2nd corner…
We have our very own MQM. The party that was the savior of all mohajirs and now is set out to free Pakistan from the “Jagirdaaraaaaaan’s” *bhai style*.
The “bechara” party as I call it, MQM is the only party that has been in power for 20+ years. But the thing is that they are always oppressed by the “namaloom afraad” who kill, loot and terrorize their innocent workers and the “awam” of Karachi. They have always been a victim of the “establishment’s” vendetta and now are at war with the unseen Taliban that are out to get Karachi. Enough reason to cry all the time I think.
Just one question to our British bhai: How come these “namaloom afraad” always, always and always show up when you call for a SOG? Oh and what in the world of AK-47 & TT do you mean by “raza karana taur per”??….Does it have anything to do with Raza Haroon?
The 3rd Corner…
Moving on to our 3rd corner, we have the saviors of democracy: The Pakistan People’s Party. The party whose ministers claim that “corruption hamara bhi haq hai”. After a statement like that is there anything left to say, other than “kal bhi Bhutto loot ta tha and aaj bhi Bhutto k naam se loot te hain”
Corner four belongs to our Phataan bhai’s, ANP. ANP holds power in Khyber Pakhtoon Khuwa but are generally focused on Karachi. They seem to be completely ignorant of the plight of the people in KPK but have statement after statement on the apathy of Karachi. We know you have a foothold in Karachi but if you can’t handle your own province how do you suppose a city like Karachi will be tamed by you??
Introducing the Referee…
The referee comes next and it is none other than our beloved PML-Q – or Lota’s – as they are commonly known. True to our Pakistani identity of today the referee (PML-Q) is on the side of the party that offers the best deal. This is why at any given time they can be in the opposition, in power or supporting a dictator.
Now to answer the burning question, who gets our vote? The thing is that every party listed above claims to change our fortunes if given power but if you take a closer look they have all been in power for the last 5 years and we have gone from bad to worse.
PPP – Ruling party and majority holder in Sindh
MQM – Coalition partner and owners of Karachi
PML-N – Hold power in Punjab
ANP – Coalition partner and hold power in KPK
PML-Q – On and off coalition partner
Oh yes… then there’s the guy at the Bell!
Now with all the corners and the referee position taken we are left with have the tsunami-wielding PTI on the bell. With the December 2011 Tsunami, they proved that they can ring the bell really loud but time will tell if they are given a chance to enter the ring and actually fight.
The only benefit that I see in voting for PTI is that they have not been given a chance before and MAYBE, just MAYBE, the change that we are looking for can come from here.